HUMOUR: You know it’s a bad day (or dental plan) when…

by R.A. Clappison, DDS, FRCD

The insurer requests details of treatment for the upper left “Sentral Inkisor.”

The original radiographs are returned with five staples through the films.

The consultant requests more details because “the patient’s pockets are not deep enough (translation: doesn’t have sufficient funds).”

The premium is $6.50 per month but ‘covers’ all services.

The clerk at the insurance company, without asking the consultant, gave you a hard time when you insisted that there were four canals in a molar.

Your treasured trimmed, polished and mounted maxillary and mandibular diagnostic models were returned requiring a ‘Crazy-Glue’ jigsaw puzzle repair — and the patient is a ‘gagger.’

The patient can’t understand why the necessary crown is not a covered service because he was assured the new plan covers ‘everything.’

The patient has a plan with a U.S.-based company and insists you use American code numbers.

The patient requires complete dual arch reconstruction and the patient’s maximum annual coverage is $1,000. The insurer requests a detailed itemized treatment plan on their form and the patient wants you to extend treatment over multiple years.

The insurer demands information by the 30th of the month because the policy expired 60 days ago. The request from the insurer arrived on the 30th and the patient is pushing for an answer.

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